FROM A SITE VISITOR: I’ve been reading your answers to angie and I’ve reread everything you wrote about MPD/DID. A decade ago, a doctor diagnosed me with MPD.. After years of therapy he kept telling me that I had to keep coming bacvk to him. I thought I was a total defect and might as well kill myself. Finally---after years of my own research and studying the enneagram and also what A.V. teachers have to say about personality---I‘m getting it. No wonder insanity is so widespread! I don’t feel so alone anymore in this struggle. I’m not the only oddball. What hit home was when you showed how so many areas---like finances and relations etc---are affected by each personality I assume. No wonder my mind never stopped! So it starts out causing some trouble and then just gets worse and worse, and this is almost universal, right?. Thanx Beverly
F.: Then you’re told that you are “The Student.” The elections at school show that classmates consider you “The Best Looking”…or not. You become more body conscious. More roles appear, more agendas appear, and more impact in all those areas begins to manifest. Later “The Friend” and “The Girlfriend” are assumed as roles. Later, “The Graduate,” “The Employee,” “The Fiancée,” “The Wife,” “The Mother,” “The Working Mom,” “The Soccer Mom,” or other roles are assumed. Even later, in some case “The Alcoholic” is assumed or “The Divorcee” comes along with “The Single Mom” and “The Failure” and “The Bad Daughter.” A search begins and "The Religious One" or "The Spiritual Giant" roles are played. Now, add in all of the areas where each of those is affected.
The more components that are added to the personality, the more fears and desires are added. Eventually, so many will be added that persons say, “I don’t even know who I am anymore.” Actually, they never did, and if they ever will, it will only happen via Full Realization. Also, notice how each adopted ego-state becomes another obstacle to being consistently happy or content and why, ultimately, being happy becomes an impossibility:
If married, “Husband” might behave in a way which results in “Wife” thinking she’s okay in terms of finances, relations, sex, self-esteem, and security. But at the same time, some teacher has not shown due respect to “Super Mother’s” child, so that role triggers a sense of feeling upset. After a conference in which the contrite teacher restores “Super Mom’s” peace, all seems “good.” “Wife” is fine, “Mother” is fine; “Homeowner” is fine; “Lover” is fine. Then, “Husband” is caught in an affair, and several ego-states feel threatened. Are you beginning to see the way in which each newly-assumed ego-state makes consistent happiness an impossibility?
Two ego-states might think they're happy, but three others become offended. Get two of those three ego-states satisfied along with the first two, and then only one ego-state is unhappy. Get the fears of that one assuaged or its desires met, and then six ego-states seem happy but then something happens that threatens three others. Are you seeing how it eventually happens that so many “stars” have to be “aligned” in proper order for happiness to happen that it becomes an impossibility?
Are you seeing that it is belief in multiplicity that sets the stage for so many opportunities to feel threatened, angry, hurt, interfered with, unfulfilled, unhappy, and/or miserable? What is the answer? Realization. Knowing the unicity preempts any false belief in multiplicities. If you Realize that you are not all those things--all those personas--then you might find THAT Which You Are. And THAT is one thing only which is not personal, which has no attributes, and which, therefore, cannot be impacted financially, relationally, sexually, or in any other relative fashion.
Then, whatever happens…happens. No do-er is assumed to be present. No false identities are taken as real. No images are assumed to be authentic, so only that which is witnessed by the “Authentic Self” is given any credibility. Believing the nonsense of parents and teachers and preachers or priests or gurus or medicine men and politicians and all of the other authority figures in various cultures led to the nonsense of believing in your roles and false identities. Then, the nonsense generated by all of those phantoms led to the nonsense of accepting personas as identities. Finally, the nonsense of accepting those roles as defining who you are led to all of the nonsense that followed.