Saturday, July 31, 2010

THERE IS NO "I LOVE YOU" IN EITHER NATURE OR IN NISARGA LIVING

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An Advaita forum focusing on Realisation, enlightenment, non-duality, Real Love, peace, freedom, Your original nature, abiding naturally, the Oneness, the Nothingness, and Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj.

Here, there is nothing that is believed, so there is no one here who wants you to believe anything, either. Here, the invitation is to be free of all that you have been programmed, conditioned, acculturated, and domesticated to believe so that you can be free, period.

F.: Can you identify any single concept that generates more emotional intoxication, more misunderstanding of what is being felt, more misunderstanding of what is driving persons, more angst, more suicide, more murder, and, yes, even more wars than the concept of "love"?

In fact, can emotional intoxication be generated by the concept of "love" to the degree that one can reach a point of insanity? Of course. Some say, "I killed her because I loved her so much that she drove me crazy." And the beginning of a "relationship" can be just as insane as the ones that end in violence.

A man who is 33 and only now in his first "relationship" with a woman said yesterday: "I am in love for the first time in my life and it's amazing. I know now why I waited so long: it's because I have finally found a woman that I could first connect with on a spiritual basis" (meaning they are both members of a 12-step group).

He said, "Just holding her hand when we walk together takes my breath away. I feel light in the head when I am with her." Indeed. And, yes, there is that suffocating aspect of what the masses take to be "love." He may well come to know that aspect far more than he could possibly anticipate at this point in his dream.

On a broader scale for a moment, consider that wars are raging around the globe right now among persons who are driven by what they call "love," whether that refers to their love of their country; to their love for revenge in the name of their countrymen; or to the love they have for their particular, personal god.

Then there is the "love" that drives persons to assume the roles that show up in the continuum of "personal relationships": strangers > friends > good friends > lovers > fiancé / fiancée > loving, wonderful spouse > spouse > a not so loving and not so wonderful spouse > enemy > mortal enemy > divorcé / divorcée > the depressed one > the recluse > the recovering one > the one looking about again > strangers > friends > good friends > ad infinitum.

Because the Nisargan can look to nature in order to understand the way that natural living happens most typically, such witnessing reveals that "love" is a concept dreamed up by humans when it is seen that "love" in nature is limited to the "love-to-be" that is the product of the manifested consciousness that would extend its continuity.

Such a drive for continuity is automatic and typical among fish and fowl and fauna, but it becomes an overwhelming desire among humans. While the "love-to-be" is there, there is no "I love you" in nature. Yes, some level of feelings can appear to happen. An incident was described in a prior post to illustrate the point:

Outside the window of the office where these writings happen, a doe dropped a stillborn fawn. She and the buck nudged the lifeless fawn, trying to encourage it to rise. They spent some time in that effort before it became obvious that this instance was not going to happen like other normal births.

They walked away, came back, nudged a few more times. They walked away a little farther, looked back as if feeling something or as if confused. Eventually, though, they left. Was there love for the stillborn fawn? No, deer know no such concepts.

Did it appear that some concerns or feelings might be happening? Maybe, but the next question is, might it be that they were just doing what happens naturally - trying to encourage a fawn to rise and walk? Could it be that when what typically happens did not happen, they left, without the kind of attachments that always entrap the non-Realized? Either way, there is no "I love you" in nature.

Similarly, among the Realized, there is no "I love you" that has any validity. That requires the duality of an "I" and a "you" - the duality of a subject and an object. "Advaita" means "not two," so "I love you" has no meaning whatsoever among the Realized.

What is understood about this subject by the Realized is this: "Love is knowing that I am everything; wisdom is knowing that I am nothing" (Maharaj). In the book that discusses the difference in the false "love" that persons speak of vs. True Love that the Realized understand, it is made clear that only the Realized are able to differentiate between the one that is false and the one that is Real. Yet even that distinction is limited to the period of relative manifestation.

Next, recall that Maharaj estimated that the number on the planet that are Realized at any given time is a small number...a four-digit number. Grasp that, then ask, "What are the chances that I - a Realized speck of consciousness that understands the difference in false "love" and Real Love - will ever cross the path of anyone who understands that difference?"

According to Maharaj, one in ten million. Is it any wonder that persons on the planet are so frustrated, searching as they are for someone to love them, for someone to make them feel whole, for someone to make them feel complete, for someone to make them feel "good"?

Add to that group the ones who are only pretending - consciously or otherwise - to be searching for love when they are really searching for caretakers, for someone to buy into their belief that they are entitled and to give them what they think they deserve, for someone to help them through their crises, for someone to support them (and their false roles), or for someone to buy into any of their other selfish agendas.

Then consider that 59% of all women in the U.S. who are murdered are murdered by a "lover" or "spouse" during a breakup and that 41% of all men are killed under the same circumstances; then consider that the same scenario is playing out on a daily basis all across the globe.

To see more examples of "love"-inspired insanity and brutality, consider that women are treated like chattel in so many cultures. Consider that women in many Islamic cultures are beaten for flashing an ankle in public. Consider that women are being stoned to death for having offended the male ego, stoned even as this post is being written.

Consider that many Christian women are being taught to be subservient to their husbands, to "love, honor and obey him." Consider the volume of insane beliefs and concepts and notions and words and actions that evolve from the warped ideas about "love" and about the way that subject-object "relationships" are supposed to happen in the opinion of non-Realized persons.

Then, see the lesson in nature: there is the "love-to-be" that accompanies the manifested consciousness. Beyond that, see the futility and the insanity of trying to "find love" and to "be loved."

What an impossible dream on a planet where the masses are trapped in self-love...in the "love" of their false selves, in the "love" that drives them to seek partners who are willing to assume and play the co-dependent counterparts that are required to sustain the illusion of all false selves.

Then, abide in the comfort of the understanding that Love is knowing that You Are everything but also in the understanding of - in the wisdom of - knowing that, really, You Are nothing.

That said, can "espousing" and "wifing" and "husbanding" and "lover-ing" still happen even in the absence of assumed personas and in the understanding of the falsity of any subject-object concept? Of course. Are the deer pairing up and enjoying sex? Oh yes. Right outside this window on occasion; however, are they BS'ing themselves that the sex they are enjoying is really not about the sex but is actually about "making love"? No.

There is no "making love." There is knowing that (1) false love is not and that (2) Real Love Is. Has any buck in the history of the planet ever tried to manipulate a doe with the line: "You would if you loved me!" No. Has any doe ever left a buck, shouting, "I don't love you any more"? No.

Has any buck, feeling as if it is dying because a doe has left him for another buck, eaten fermented berries to get high in an effort to try to ease the pain of a breakup, raced wildly and drunkenly along a path through the forest, missed a curve, run head on into a tree, and killed itself? No. Nature is not capable of generating or facilitating stupidity.

The concept of "love" among non-Realized persons has likely generated more insanity and more relative destruction than any other concept ever dreamed up by humans.

If you would avoid all of that, come to understand the difference in "love" and "Love"; then, go live naturally, enjoying in a sane and nisarga manner all of the pleasures of the relative existence while knowing it is all happening in nothing more than an "AS IF" fashion.

Please enter the silence of contemplation.

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