"Sleeping aids" are used by persons unconsciously as a result of programming and conditioning and enculturation. The "aids"--actually deterrents to awakening--keep persons asleep and prevent them from being awake, aware, and conscious. Most will never know Reality. Only a few will discover that Realization provides the solution to their relative problems. They will continue along the path that one described recently when he sent an e-mail saying, “I can’t really take much reality at a time. I can only take a small dose at a time. I have to escape from reality and fantasize and daydream.” He did not have a clue that what he's actually trying to escape from is not Reality but is the nightmare of his miserable experiences as a result of being out of touch with Reality.
Following a recent accident in which the body suffered the breaking of eight major bones, countless fractures, displacement of the shoulders and hips, and abrasions over many parts of the body, it can be reported that the pain experienced by the body seems less severe when asleep than when fully awake. In truth, the pain is the pain. Being asleep might provide what seems to be a respite, but being asleep is not really a respite, the pain is there, it does not end because of being asleep, and sleep does not eliminate the cause of the pain.
Why are most living their lives in a similar fashion? Depressed people seldon know, much less admit, that they are depressed. After being depressed for years, depression seems “normal.” Most persons are offended if a professional asks to test them for depression or anxiety disorders and take offense at any who suggest their lives are marred by misery. Most will claim, “I have a pretty darn good life, really,” though inventory would show the truth: few are truly happy and free. Some of the reasons include the following that block Realization:
Sleeping Aids—Memories: Recollections based in illusion. The “memories” that allow persons to experience the most misery are those involving the most assumed identities. Why do some “illusions of the past” seem to trigger more misery than others, if they are all illusions? Because some “memories” involve “recollections” of happenings that involved more false identities than others. Too, memories are distortions at their core. Persons did not see rightly in "the past" so they cannot possibly perceive "the past" correctly in the present.
Sleeping Aids—Hopes and Dreams: In a nation that refers to what it has to offer as “The American Dream,” most consider it a sacrilege to address the illusions involved with taking dreams and hopes to be real. It is impossible for either to be real. In ignoring that truth, misery results. Hoping is about the future; dreaming is about the past or the future. Both past and future are illusions, and no one “living” in the past or the future has ever been happy in the present. Hoping and dreaming deal with wishing and wanting and desiring. Wishing and wanting and desiring are linked to fear, and no one being driven by wishes, hopes, dreams or fears can possibly be at peace, much less happy. Bliss can only happen in the NOW. Here are two recent examples that reveal why Advaitan teachers invite their students to give up the dream and see the real. First, an intelligent man said recently that he really had everything he needed but was still unhappy and asked for an Advaitan explanation. Several conversations revealed that a father with a doctor’s degree and a successful practice had withheld praising his son, criticizing him for not earning higher degrees, for not being smart enough as a result, and for not having a job of the status of the father’s. The father sent signals to the son all his life that he was not bright enough and not good enough. Of course the father’s ego could only “love” someone who was an exact reflection of him. As in all cases, those assuming ego-states as identities can only “love” “others” who are an exact image or replica of them. Four decades later, the son is miserable. Why? The Advaita teaching makes clear: the son has a HOPE that the father will finally give a sign of love and acceptance of the son as He Is. He has DREAMED all his life that he could have that kind of acceptance from his father. The son will remain trapped in misery until he realizes that his hope that a father who is incapable of loving unconditionally will suddenly love unconditionally. He will be trapped in his misery as long as he clings to the dream that a father whose ego forces him to withhold praise and acceptance (and who can only “love” self) will suddenly know the Oneness and change his conduct when around the son. A father who does not know Who He Is cannot possibly know That Which The son Is and be at one with him. A father living in so many ego-states will automatically create a sense of "separation." In a second case, a man remained miserable for years after his wife left him. The woman had been raised by a cold, abusive father and by a mother who repressed all feelings and raised her daughter to do the same. Now more than fifty years old, the woman has never been told by either parent that they love her. The family has a "no-hugging" rule. Their daughter is therefore also incapable of loving unconditionally. The man involved with her lost his role as “husband” when she left. He mourned the loss of that ego-state for years, miserable in his HOPE that the woman would suddenly be able to love. He DREAMED of a tight-knit home and family. His hopes and dreams left him dependent on her image as “lover” and “wife” and “the key to fulfilling his dreams” and "creating a family." His misery did not end until he realized the truth: there is no hope that the woman will ever learn to love uncondtionally, and if she does, he’ll not be the object. His misery did not end until he realized that his dream was just that—a dream, the complete opposite of reality. While many tout the wonderful benefits of having hopes and dreams, the examples above illustrate that both are only beneficial to perpetuating false identities and continuing misery. Hope involves desire, and desire involves a perception of having unmet needs. Wrongly believing that one has unmet needs generates a false sense of fear. Desire and fear are never separate, and fear and peace never happen together. The examples above show clearly the fact that the failure to see reality—while believing in dreams and holding out for false hopes to happen—is the cause of misery in the relative existence. Hoping and dreaming always put the person hoping and dreaming at the mercy of “others” and dependent on “others” for fulfillment. If waiting for "another" to fulfill hopes and dreams, if trying to manipulate "others" to fulfill hopes and dreams, or if trying to force "others" to fulfill hopes and dreams, then peace cannot come. Focusing on hopes, dreams, and "others" fosters a belief in duality, and peace can never happen as long as persons cling to the illusion that dualities can be real. Please enter the silence of contemplation. [To be continued]
Following a recent accident in which the body suffered the breaking of eight major bones, countless fractures, displacement of the shoulders and hips, and abrasions over many parts of the body, it can be reported that the pain experienced by the body seems less severe when asleep than when fully awake. In truth, the pain is the pain. Being asleep might provide what seems to be a respite, but being asleep is not really a respite, the pain is there, it does not end because of being asleep, and sleep does not eliminate the cause of the pain.
Why are most living their lives in a similar fashion? Depressed people seldon know, much less admit, that they are depressed. After being depressed for years, depression seems “normal.” Most persons are offended if a professional asks to test them for depression or anxiety disorders and take offense at any who suggest their lives are marred by misery. Most will claim, “I have a pretty darn good life, really,” though inventory would show the truth: few are truly happy and free. Some of the reasons include the following that block Realization:
Sleeping Aids—Memories: Recollections based in illusion. The “memories” that allow persons to experience the most misery are those involving the most assumed identities. Why do some “illusions of the past” seem to trigger more misery than others, if they are all illusions? Because some “memories” involve “recollections” of happenings that involved more false identities than others. Too, memories are distortions at their core. Persons did not see rightly in "the past" so they cannot possibly perceive "the past" correctly in the present.
Sleeping Aids—Hopes and Dreams: In a nation that refers to what it has to offer as “The American Dream,” most consider it a sacrilege to address the illusions involved with taking dreams and hopes to be real. It is impossible for either to be real. In ignoring that truth, misery results. Hoping is about the future; dreaming is about the past or the future. Both past and future are illusions, and no one “living” in the past or the future has ever been happy in the present. Hoping and dreaming deal with wishing and wanting and desiring. Wishing and wanting and desiring are linked to fear, and no one being driven by wishes, hopes, dreams or fears can possibly be at peace, much less happy. Bliss can only happen in the NOW. Here are two recent examples that reveal why Advaitan teachers invite their students to give up the dream and see the real. First, an intelligent man said recently that he really had everything he needed but was still unhappy and asked for an Advaitan explanation. Several conversations revealed that a father with a doctor’s degree and a successful practice had withheld praising his son, criticizing him for not earning higher degrees, for not being smart enough as a result, and for not having a job of the status of the father’s. The father sent signals to the son all his life that he was not bright enough and not good enough. Of course the father’s ego could only “love” someone who was an exact reflection of him. As in all cases, those assuming ego-states as identities can only “love” “others” who are an exact image or replica of them. Four decades later, the son is miserable. Why? The Advaita teaching makes clear: the son has a HOPE that the father will finally give a sign of love and acceptance of the son as He Is. He has DREAMED all his life that he could have that kind of acceptance from his father. The son will remain trapped in misery until he realizes that his hope that a father who is incapable of loving unconditionally will suddenly love unconditionally. He will be trapped in his misery as long as he clings to the dream that a father whose ego forces him to withhold praise and acceptance (and who can only “love” self) will suddenly know the Oneness and change his conduct when around the son. A father who does not know Who He Is cannot possibly know That Which The son Is and be at one with him. A father living in so many ego-states will automatically create a sense of "separation." In a second case, a man remained miserable for years after his wife left him. The woman had been raised by a cold, abusive father and by a mother who repressed all feelings and raised her daughter to do the same. Now more than fifty years old, the woman has never been told by either parent that they love her. The family has a "no-hugging" rule. Their daughter is therefore also incapable of loving unconditionally. The man involved with her lost his role as “husband” when she left. He mourned the loss of that ego-state for years, miserable in his HOPE that the woman would suddenly be able to love. He DREAMED of a tight-knit home and family. His hopes and dreams left him dependent on her image as “lover” and “wife” and “the key to fulfilling his dreams” and "creating a family." His misery did not end until he realized the truth: there is no hope that the woman will ever learn to love uncondtionally, and if she does, he’ll not be the object. His misery did not end until he realized that his dream was just that—a dream, the complete opposite of reality. While many tout the wonderful benefits of having hopes and dreams, the examples above illustrate that both are only beneficial to perpetuating false identities and continuing misery. Hope involves desire, and desire involves a perception of having unmet needs. Wrongly believing that one has unmet needs generates a false sense of fear. Desire and fear are never separate, and fear and peace never happen together. The examples above show clearly the fact that the failure to see reality—while believing in dreams and holding out for false hopes to happen—is the cause of misery in the relative existence. Hoping and dreaming always put the person hoping and dreaming at the mercy of “others” and dependent on “others” for fulfillment. If waiting for "another" to fulfill hopes and dreams, if trying to manipulate "others" to fulfill hopes and dreams, or if trying to force "others" to fulfill hopes and dreams, then peace cannot come. Focusing on hopes, dreams, and "others" fosters a belief in duality, and peace can never happen as long as persons cling to the illusion that dualities can be real. Please enter the silence of contemplation. [To be continued]