WHEN THE EARLIEST DUALITIES PLAGUE THE RELATIVE EXISTENCE OF ADULT-AGED PERSONS, Part Two

F.: Yesterday, this pointer was offered:

By that point, belief in the five earliest dualities is in place. Eventually, those persons who were programmed and conditioned with dualistic teachings as children become obsessive adults, behaving compulsively in their efforts to do all required to always hear “Yes” and to never hear “No”; fanatical in their efforts to have all of their desires met while wanting to avoid all that they fear; and fixated in their efforts to accumulate all that they “want” and to avoid everything that they “don’t want.”

All of that dualistic programming generates a belief in personas as identities, so personality disorders inevitability follow. The billions of (non-Realized) persons on the planet seldom move beyond body identification—which is the most extreme degree of separation from Reality. It is also an identity that will guarantee the perpetuation of “The Child” ego-state (along with misery and suffering as well).

During a session last summer, one such person who was trapped in the body level of identification revealed that he had engaged in over 300 extramarital affairs during his marriage. Most involved pay-for-sex type arrangements but many involved women who thought he cared and that he was available...only to be rejected in short order.

His Addictive Personality Disorder revealed itself through drug use, alcohol abuse, and an addiction to sex and "love," but his most basic identity amounted to “I am my body.” Driving his conduct, however, was also a “mind” and multiple personas.

Therefore, the male sex drive, the effects of his nucleus accumbens, and the archetypal motivation for him to scatter seeds aside, far more was at play with that man’s conduct. Only a few questions were required to reveal "The Child" motives that were at play in his “play.”

He reported the following: after his father disappeared, he was rejected by his mother who gave him to his grandmother; a short time later, his grandmother rejected him and gave him over to the state. His childhood desire was to hear his mother say “Yes” instead of “No”; to hear his grandmother say “Yes” rather than “No”; to alleviate his fear of further rejection; and to get what he “wanted” and to avoid what he did “not want.”

As a child who was wanted by no one, he felt a sense of “loss.” His thought-life was one that said, “You are not good enough; you will never be good enough; therefore, you will never have enough…of anything.” Behind those kinds of beliefs, excess will always be assigned great value.

His desire was to be accepted by two women during his childhood years, but since he was not, he was driven during his adulthood years to hear as many women say “Yes” as possible; to hear as many women as possible say “You are good”; to have women fulfill his self-ish desires; to use women in his effort to negate his fear of being rejected by supposedly being “accepted” time and time again (as if paying someone for something could even remotely mean that they "accept you").

His rationalized claim that “I just really love women” was eventually shown to be nothing more than deception and self-deception. He was shown that he actually hated women and that the repetition compulsion was in full bloom and manifesting through his childish conduct. He was eventually shown that he was doing to as many women as possible what the first two women in his life had done to him: he “had” them, and then he rejected them.

His was a selfish mission of revenge on one hand and a self-centered mission of seeking the acceptance he never had as a child on the other hand. In the process, he had also rejected his wife, yet he was egotistical enough to be angry and delusional enough to think that his wife had rejected him. In his 30’s, his behavior was that of an early teen at best, driven by the dualistic beliefs of a five to seven-year old.

When dominated by the earliest childhood “memories,” childish behavior follows, no matter the age of the person involved. The result is that most persons never reject the “Child” persona and burden their relative existence with an effort to convince “self” and “others” that they are good. The result is a person totally self-absorbed, self-obsessed, and self-centered. Part of the treatment is to begin by rejecting the concepts of “self” and “others.”

Such narcissism as displayed by that male is typical among the non-Realized. Having no clue as to what the True Self is, they are driven by a collection of false selves to accumulate more…and more…and more. Further, that male really thought that he was “happy” and “free,” doing what he wanted and getting what he wanted and enjoying what he got.

He had no clue at all that when co-dependent, as he was, then there can be no independence. In the absence of independence, who that is not free could really be happy? The truly happy are relaxed. Being “relaxed” was the farthest thing from his condition.

So what about you? Are you relaxed, or are you on a mission? If you are not relaxed or if you are on a mission, find WHO is not relaxed. Find WHO is involved is relentless seeking.

Quests are exhausting. To know that You already Are That Which You seek can begin the process of being free of doingness and thereafter relaxing in the lightness of being. Please enter the silence of contemplation. (To be continued)
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SHIFTS IN CONSCIOUSNESS, SHIFTS IN DEEDS, Part Ten, The Conclusion

FROM A SITE VISITOR: Do you think that the realized should be able to tolerate any kind of environment or any kind of people? It sounds like you are saying that. I’ve been reading your writings for several months and lately, there are people I spent a lot of time with before but now I’m not spending time with them at all. I’m not realized, but even if I were, I feel certain that there are some people I just wouldn’t want to be around. Art

F.: So, Art, it has been shown that there are times when some persons leave other persons out of egotism and that there are times when some persons with hidden agendas seek out or stay with other persons in order to use them to sustain ego-states and to meet relative desires and to avoid relative fears.

There are also instances when relative-only factors are involved with staying or going, such as when someone is being abused mentally, emotionally, and/or physically; such as when someone is being used and realizes that their enabling is causing someone to remain dependent instead of being free; or such as when the “relationship” should never have been entered into from the start.

As for the notion that the Realized should “tolerate” others, if that means “passively permitting or putting up with,” understand that all happens spontaneously with the Realized. Some among the Realized might appear to be passive; some might appear to be active. What happens…happens.

If “tolerate” means “to suffer something to be done by not hindering or prohibiting it,” understand that Realization does not result in being disengaged from relative happenings. And it certainly does not result in trying to control relative happenings.

Yet the Realized are not insulated from happenings with employment, from dealings that involve children or mates, or from events such as wars or fires or earthquakes or robberies or assaults. What does mark the relative existence, post-Realization, is a non-attachment to false identities and an absence of being driven blindly and irrationally by personality or agendas or desires or fears or emotional intoxication.

Maharaj was once asked a question about what he would do if he saw someone being beaten. Would he rush in to aid the victim of the beating or not? He explained that the cause of any action is the cause of all prior actions, so he did not predict. Whatever happened, if that circumstance were presented, would happen spontaneously. The cause of whatever action was or was not taken would be a result of the accumulation of all causes up to that very instant.

More relevant than those types of “what if” scenarios, however, is this question: does a shift in consciousness result in a shift away from the type of deeds or actions that were happening during the period of non-Realization? Of course, and it all happens automatically and spontaneously.

Now Art, a final pointer on your questions about “spending time with certain people” and “tolerance”: when belief in the illusion of “self” is eliminated, it will be understood that there is no "one" to tolerate (or not tolerate) anything. You’ll understand that the Realized do not have to “go” anywhere to be at peace, though many do seem to pass more time in natural or natural-like settings (meaning, calm and undisturbed by the type of doingness that drives persons).

Yet even in a crowd, even in a chaotic workplace, peace can happen if witnessing without attachment happens. Indeed, there is nothing to do to maintain the peace. Peace is about beingness, not doingness. Beingness and peace happen in the absence of a “do-er,” not in the presence of a supposed “do-er.”

Many who are attached to all of their so-called “spiritual exercises” have not understood this point. Post Full Realization, there is no "do-er" to do exercises and no “maintainer” to work daily to maintain anything. All just happens spontaneously.

Peace happens no matter the surroundings, though there is, post-Realization, a shift toward the peace and quiet and silence as self-lessness (and eventually even SELF-lessness) are understood.

At that point, there is no longer any assumption that there is any “one” to “move” or “stay” or “go.” Whatever happens happens spontaneously and naturally. “But what if I am being abused?” someone asked in an e-mail. The response: "Is it natural to be abused? No, so if abuse is happening in one place, the Realized would automatically move toward another place."

Might the movement toward the silence reduce the number of persons invited into your environs who could disrupt the silence? That often is the case, and you mentioned that there were persons you spent a lot of time with before but now spend no time with at all. That is not uncommon as the “journey” to Realization happens.

However, let it be emphasized that Realization does not mean that the Realized cannot be involved at all in “ordinary life” or in the “relative existence.” Quite to the contrary. A relative existence marked by pleasure and joy and beingness is engaged in far more fully than during any pre-Realization life that was marked by turmoil and chaos and noise and doingness and dissociation and disengagement.

Belief in the duality of “with” vs. “apart from” is nonexistent. Too, the solitude is not sought out. It just happens. There is no “one” that is moving toward or away from, unlike the persons in the case studies in this series who all feel certain that they can maneuver and manipulate events to their will and who all believe that they can make certain they get what they want. The fact is that the relative existence is devoid of certainty.

The only certainty is You. Via the tapping into the inner resource—the inner guru—that which is certain (namely the Absolute, the Awareness, the Void) can be understood.

Understand, though, that happiness cannot happen before independence happens. Who that is not free could truly be happy? Who that is driven by thoughts and words and deeds which they do not select (but that have been pre-selected because of programming and conditioning) could possibly be happy, even though their delusion is that they have power and the ability to choose?

When a shift in consciousness happens (that is, when the obstacles to seeing truth and reason are removed) then a spontaneous and automatic shift happens. Both sin and morality disappear; unfounded fears of punishment and empty dreams about rewards disappear; and an understanding of the functioning of the totality appears. Then peace happens, automatically and spontaneously. Please enter into the silence of contemplation.

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