F.: [Continued from yesterday]: From entrapment in ego-states, and the egotism that they generate and the desire to accumulate that they inspire, it is a short leap from, “I love my wife” to “but she’s not enough…does not give me enough.” It is a short leap from “At one point I loved my husband,” to “but he has never honored me enough so now I hate him.”
The additional trap is this: all ego-states are rooted in co-dependency: employee cannot exist without employer; husband cannot exist without spouse; lover cannot exist without a lover; and “The Super Lover” cannot exist with multiple lovers. All co-dependency, in turn, robs one of freedom and thus generates a plethora of fears and desires and misery.
The planet-wide result of being programmed early on to believe in dualities is that billions of adult-aged humans behave as if they were children, trapped in “The Child” role as they are; thinking in their magical ways; believing that their dogma and other supernatural tales which are based in ancient myths are true; and speaking and acting in ways that reveal their disdain for logic and reason.
Yesterday, one example was offered of the way that the dualities of “good vs. bad” and “reward vs. punishment” and “want vs. don’t want,” programmed into children at an early age, can drive the thoughts and words and deeds of persons throughout their adulthood years.
Another example presented itself last week which illustrates the pointer as well. Prior to the last seminar, one employee was not going to be able to attend because it was being offered during his vacation. He had already been excused from attendance, but he was driven by “The Child” persona to write an e-mail to his supervisor.
That letter contained nearly two pages of examples of the good work he has done in the past. The lengthy exposé reminded the supervisor that he is a good employee, one of the best in fact, and deserves reward and certainly should not be punished for missing the seminar.
Rather than functioning as an adult, the content of his letter revealed that he is dominated by “The Child” who wants the “good” label and wants to avoid the “bad” label. His letter included assertions such as…
“I am a good employee. I’m not sure you know how good I am” (an upgrade on the dualistic illusion that I am a good boy). The content really said, “Please like me even if I don’t attend. Please continue to reward me in the future. Show me that you accept me…that you care…that you appreciate me just as I am. Say something that takes away my fears that you might think I’m not good enough.” It continued:
“I usually attend all training sessions and I volunteer for extra work and assignments with this company” (which really affirms again, I want you to see that I am a good boy.) Then, childishly, he suggested the dates be changed, though the timing worked well for several dozen employees and supervisors and had been arranged for weeks.
There was a letter that never needed to be written, his having been told already that he was excused. Realized, he would have enjoyed his time off; trapped in the ego-state of “The Child” (a setup from childhood programming and conditioning) he is instead driven by a fear of being punished; a desire to be seen as good; his wanting to receive rewards; a desire to get what he wants when he wants it; and his not wanting to be punished.
All those thoughts and words are derived from his having been trained to believe in duality, especially with the notions that “I am not enough, I am not good enough, and as a result I will never have enough, so I must accumulate in all areas.”
That setup drives persons throughout childhood, and then throughout adulthood, to try constantly to “sell or promote themselves”; to work at creating and maintaining a “positive image”; and to engage in a constant effort to market themselves as one who is not merely good but who is really good.
What about you? Have you been driven to try to sell or promote yourself? Have you been driven to work at creating and maintaining a “positive image”? Have you been driven to engage in a constant effort to market yourself as one who is not merely good but who is really good? Has your relative existence been marked by one disappointment after another when people did not buy into all that? Have you suffered because you are dependent on what (unawake and unaware) persons think of you? What an exhausting relative existence all that work and effort and engagement produces.
How impossible it becomes to relax and take it easy when being blindly driven by programming and conditioning from childhood. How impossible it is to enjoy any existence that is dominated by dualistic thoughts, dualistic words, and duality-inspired behavior. If you have not already, might You now be ready to take the steps that result is the casting aside of all beliefs and concepts?
Do you see that the continued belief in “their” concepts will guarantee the continuation of fluctuations and instability that produce periods of chaos as well as periods of harmony? Periods of “up’s” as well as periods of “down’s”; periods of behaving sanely as well as periods of acting like an immature child; and periods of happiness as well as periods of misery? Please enter the silence of contemplation. (To be continued)
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